I just started an internship at a local clinic to complete my medical assistant's degree. It is absolutely wonderful to have a career in sight. I finally feel like I am returning to somewhat normal. On my first day, I was terrified that Gerp would make noises, so I thought if I didn't eat before I went to work that it would stay quiet. I was wrong. I was assisting with a procedure and Gerp decided to start making really loud noises and all I could do was say, "Oh, I haven't eaten today. My stomach is going crazy." Even more embarrassing, I had just met the doctor who was doing the procedure and he was gorgeous. I'm pretty sure he could tell I had a bag because I had a wonderful gas bulge develop. He looked at me and said, "Wow, your stomach is really loud." And then he went back to the procedure.
The thing I was most worried about had happened, and it wasn't that bad. I'm glad it happened on my first day. It wasn't as gut-wrenchingly embarrassing as I had dreaded and no one really cares. Now I make sure I get breakfast before I go in and I realized that the tummy rumbling excuse doesn't really work, but I really don't care.
I can look back on so many moments with my ostomy and remember being horrified that something would happen like the tail sticking out of my shorts and someone seeing it, or my first public bag leak, or someone asking me what was the bulge on the right side of my stomach. When they happen, it wasn't nearly as bad as what I thought they would be. I know it's really easy to psych yourself out doing something for fear that something will happen with your bag, but those moments are usually never as bad as what you play them up to be in your mind.
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Angelica- As usual, you've written another interesting post. February 5th, 2019, was my reversal surgery after having an ileo for 6 months. I'm one of those fortunate success stories. Of course, things are different now, and I still have to be careful about what and how much I eat, as I don't have a colon. At first, I was afraid to leave the house. My biggest fear was having to use a public bathroom and have the toilet not flush! Even now, when I know that I'll be in someone else's home, I won't eat anything beforehand. I read other people's stories and sometimes feel guilty for having had it so easy, not to mention that I have a significant other who is 100 percent supportive. I've gotten so much out of this website and truly feel for those of you who have it so much worse than I. But I feel it necessary to let folks hear about the success stories.
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