Ostomy Memories of Doing More

HAVING AN ILEOSTOMY, SOME OF MY BODY PARTS are gone, but some of my remaining inner bits seem at times to be straining to do something more than I have been asking them to do.  I think that it’s mostly my nerves, my bones, and my heart, although my brain pitches in occasionally with its two cents.  They seem to feel like they could be doing more, that I could be doing more, that is.  It’s too late, I mutter.  I’m beyond all that.  I do think often of those things that I could have done, but didn’t.  Why not?  You can only do so much, I say back.  You have to sleep sometime, you know.  But still… you would have been good at that, or that, or maybe even that.  Yes, well, I didn’t make those choices.  I liked what I chose to do and, like Satchel Paige, I’m not looking back, something may be gaining on me.  But those persistent ghosts are still out there, and you hear them moaning every once in a while.  All I can do is smile ruefully and moan back.  

Should have, would have, could have... kiss that goodbye - another good thing about getting old. A legitimate excuse why we can easily forget those things - because we're too damn old. Thanks, Henry - I am always looking for the plus side of turning 80 this year. jb