So 13 years ago I had my bladder removed along with my prostate and 16 lymph nodes. A urostoma was installed. I was very lucky and for some reason I healed very quickly and was back to work in 3 weeks. Twice I had a nurse show me how to change my bag and I was discharged from the hospital in a week and never saw another nurse.
But I then noticed I never got an erection of any kind. As it turns out, an erection is produced not just with blood (I have a full complement of blood) but by a nerve. During the operation to save my life, this nerve is severed. That's it... no more erections, hence... no more hanky-panky! I was not told this would actually happen, my operating doctor said I might have a problem but there were ways around it.
So was this a big deal? At the time I was devastated!
After some time and thought, my opinion gradually reformed for a number of reasons. First off, I was not 20 years old; I had just turned 60. I had been noticing, as did my wife of 40 years, that my erections weren't the bone hard they were in the past. Well, to be honest, the bone hard thing was fading quickly into memory. So destiny was now in charge of the whole situation. Sex was on the way out anyway as I was not now or ever going to depend on chemicals to help out in the bedroom. That seemed just weird to us. So here we are; I'm now 81 (a few days ago) and my wife and I are as much in love as ever, if not more every day.
We have 4 lovely grandchildren and a very close-knit, loving family, what more could a couple want later in life.
Think about this: if you lose your bladder, prostate, and erection... it is only the end of the world if you let it be.