Post-Surgery Intimacy: Seeking Advice on Comfort and Adjustment

Hello there,

I had my rectum removed 4 weeks ago. I feel fine and my husband and I decided we may "have a go" and restore our sexual relationship.

I must admit I found it really enjoyable, however I don't think my hubby had the same experience. We are very open to each other and we expected things will be different. But he said he found it very tight, bumpy and even slightly painful and oversensitive. So here is the question, is there anything I could do to stretch the channel? Any ideas welcome.

Thanks

P

Good Evening Pembedata,

It's good to know that someone is 'getting back to it' again lol.

I'm not quite sure what you men though. You say that your rectum has been removed...I'm assumming therefore that your anal passage has been sewn up? Correct me if I'm wrong. My confusion as which 'channel' you were referring to - whether you were having anal or vaginal sex.

But in either case, I'm sure you can go to any number of stores or even shop online for vibrators and dildoes of different sizes...used on you regularly in succession over a few weeks and making sure you're comfortably lubricated for easy penetration hopefully you may find you will begin to open up a little more to allow your husband a more enjoyable fit into you.

Possibly sounds to simple but alot better than shoe stretchers. I hope you find something to suit you both.

Opto xx

Hi optomist, thanks for your response. I meant my vigina. The idea about a suitable size dildo crossed my mind, but I thought maybe there are more "sophisticated"/ medical solutions out there that I am not aware of. I guess what concerns me more is whether the "narrowing" is there permanently as the vigina "fell" backwards when the recrum was removed and the angle will always be kind of wrong. Hence not sure how "fixable/adaptable that problem actually is. Does that make sense? I remember the surgeon telling me a while back that things will never be the same. So I am not expecting to get back to "normal", but hope to at least get closer to a comfortable fit. The lubrication is a must of course and non-issue. Thanks again for your prompt response. I know it is a very sensitive topic and not many people will actually respond, so I genuinely appreciate your input.

Sorry to hear of your difficulties. This is not something I have personally had an issue with but I have heard of vaginal dilatory and wonder if they may be helpful as are used to stretch the vagina when tightens due to menopause or other issues which cause tightening or narrowing. Lots of info online if you google the term. Wishing you a good recovery.