Post-Surgery Pain and Bleeding - Need Encouragement

Hi everyone, well it's been a month since my surgery and the pain is still pretty intense and I still can't sit. I still have some drainage. I feel like I should be much further than I am. I walked to the mailbox and started bleeding. If I try to sit more than a few minutes, I bleed. At night, it really hurts. Anyone else had this problem? I could really use some encouragement.

Hi, I had my butt surgery in May this year. Only now, it is becoming easier to sit and be comfortable with my strange new ass. If it's any comfort to you, I am in no doubt that I did the right thing by having an ileostomy, a new bag, and a sore bottom. Believing me, giving up a butt as a gay man may, in time, hurt even more. Having said all that, I love my new life. I can now live a normal life, and I'm sure you will in 6 weeks' time. Hang on in there.

Thanks for the encouragement.

Hello drfields24.  Your symptoms sound like a fairly 'normal' reaction to a surgical procedure. A month is early days for healing after major surgery and exercising patience is the best sort of exercise you can indulge in at this time if you don't want to extend the healing time unnecessarily. As for the increased pain at night time. This is a common and natural phenomenon as the distracting things in our environment close down and we are left with focussing on our own bodies and minds. Even without the pain of surgery, many people have difficulties at nights with the strangeness involved in the mind not having the external distractions of everyday life  and the subconscious refocussing on things they don't really understand very well. The mind tries to make sense of strange/new phenomenon and there are few things stranger than the human body and even more so the human mind. Trying to make sense of chronic pain just adds to the anxiety and probably exaggerates and exacerbates the feelings involved in the experience. If it gets too bad and you start losing sleep (which is very important in the healing process), then it may be time to take some remedial action and seek help. I'm not one for recommending drugs, but they can be helpful in the short-term to relax the mind and give some respite. However, I am a firm believer in the power of the mind in coping and managing these sorts of problems and there are some useful techniques for pain-management which use cognitive processes rather than medication. Professional help is often a good investment in this regard if you don't have access to your own  DIY remedies.

I think you will find that over the next few weeks and months, things will gradually and naturally get better for you without even trying anything other than chilling out about the whole thing.

Or at least I hope so for your peace of mind.

Best wishes

Bill  

Had my surgery on April 20, and I know what you're going through. Everyone hits different things at different times, but the first month sucked, the second month sucked less, and the third month I'm feeling pretty normal.

The biggest helper for me was Epsom salt baths 2x a day for 20 minutes to keep the butt clean, and then take a blow dryer to it to make sure it dries out as much as possible. That helped cut my pain by 60% within 3 days. Arbitrary numbers, but the point being it had a very significant effect.

The furthest thing I could have imagined was riding a bike, but I've been doing that again for the past 3 weeks, getting longer and longer each time with less to no discomfort at all. Spot bleeding ceased 1.5-2 months ago. So things will get better, just stay focused and disciplined in doing the right things.

All of my body systems took a hit, but each one has slowly returned to normalcy, or close to.

Worth mentioning, I have also gone nuts with my health team ensuring I can do everything possible, and I mean everything: naturopath, physician, surgeon, nutritionist, counselor, chiropractor, and physiotherapist. Do everything you can, what's more important than your health?

If you have any questions, let me know. I'd be happy to help! Stay positive and be with positive people!

My Ostomy Journey: Ryan | Hollister

Sorry, I don't have any advice, I've not been through this surgery yet. My time is coming soon though, hopefully early this fall. Hang in there, I'm pulling for you, and trying to learn at the same time!

Hi, I had my surgery three months ago now, on May 3rd, 2018, and I'm feeling great. I returned to work one month ago. I have a normal, healthy sex life, which was one thing I was worried about, but all is in order in that department too. The surgery itself was worth every minute of discomfort just to have my quality of life back. My new wee bag has been very good to me so far with few problems. I wish I had gotten my surgery sooner, as my life has changed for the better. I've booked a short flight to the Gold Coast with my partner. We're heading off in November. I've never been, so this is one trip I'm really looking forward to, as this kind of trip used to be my biggest stressor when I had UC.

Victor

Hi, I had my surgery three months ago now, on 3rd May 2018, and I'm feeling great. I returned to work one month ago. I have a normal, healthy sex life, which was one thing I was worried about, but all is in order in that department too. The surgery itself was worth every minute of discomfort just to have my quality of life back. My new wee bag has been very good to me so far with few problems. I wish I got my surgery sooner as my life has changed for the better. I've booked a short flight to the Gold Coast with my partner. We head off in November. I've never been, so this is one trip I'm really looking forward to, as this kind of trip used to be my biggest stressor when I had UC.

Victor

Hi, I had my "Barbie Butt" surgery in 2018. I can tell you, having it means you don't have the problem of a sore butt hole when and if you get diarrhea. LOL. It did take time to heal. No regrets of having it done. I wish you good luck in your healing process. I find having an ostomy has many advantages. Bye now. Have a great day and always think positive. ARLee

Hello everyone! Had my 2nd surgery last Monday, and so happy to be done with it. Had ulcerative colitis, and surgery was highly recommended, as nothing seemed to help. Got the hang of the ostomy bag, (that surgery was at the end of October 2022) and to be honest, once I did, I was a happy little camper! I got comfortable with that procedure, and then I had to go in for part 2! The removal of the rectum! Anyway, that is behind me now, (excuse the pun!) but my tush is so sore! I thought I was doing great, but then discovered a bit of blood, and thought I would die! Is this normal? It isn't a lot of blood, but was surprised to see any at all! Anyway, wondering for those of you who have gone thru this, I need to ask. How long before you can sit like a normal person? As for now, I shift from side to side, and can't wait till this uncomfortable feeling goes away. By the way, I love this site! At least you know you are not alone, and people truly understand what you are going thru!

Hello everyone! Had my 2nd surgery last Monday, and so happy to be done with it. Had ulcerative colitis, and surgery was highly recommended, as nothing seemed to help. Got the hang of the ostomy bag, (that surgery was at the end of October 2022) and to be honest, once I did, I was a happy little camper! I got comfortable with that procedure, and then I had to go in for part 2! The removal of the rectum! Anyway, that is behind me now, (excuse the pun!) but my tush is so sore! I thought I was doing great, but then discovered a bit of blood, and thought I would die! Is this normal? It isn't a lot of blood, but was surprised to see any at all! Anyway, wondering for those of you who have gone through this, I need to ask. How long before you can sit like a normal person? As for now, I shift from side to side, and can't wait till this uncomfortable feeling goes away. By the way, I love this site! At least you know you are not alone, and people truly understand what you are going through!