Topic Explanation
The forum discussion revolves around the emotional and relational challenges faced by individuals after undergoing ostomy surgery. The original poster expresses feelings of depression and relationship struggles post-surgery, noting that while they are grateful to be alive, the ostomy has taken more from their life than expected, particularly affecting their personal relationships.

Advice and Insights

1. Acceptance and Self-Love:
- Many participants emphasize the importance of self-acceptance and loving oneself. They suggest that once you accept who you are, including your ostomy, you will be more open to finding someone who loves you for you.

2. Perspective on Relationships:
- Several replies highlight that if a relationship ends because of an ostomy, it likely wasn't strong to begin with. The right person will accept you as you are, ostomy included.

3. Coping with Depression:
- It's common to experience depression after ostomy surgery, but it's important to differentiate between temporary and more persistent depression. Seeking professional help and therapy can be beneficial.
- Participants encourage patience with the emotional process and suggest focusing on personal growth and self-discovery.

4. Support Systems:
- Engaging with support groups, either in person or online, can provide a sense of community and understanding. Sharing experiences with others who have gone through similar situations can be comforting.

5. Finding Joy and Purpose:
- Participants suggest finding hobbies or activities that bring joy and help build confidence. This can also be a way to meet new people and form new relationships.

6. Professional Help:
- Seeking professional help for depression and anxiety is recommended. Therapy and medication can be effective in managing mental health challenges.

7. Spiritual and Emotional Support:
- Some participants find solace in spirituality or religion, which provides them with strength and comfort during difficult times.

8. Realistic Expectations:
- It's acknowledged that not everyone will find a partner, but this is not unique to those with an ostomy. The journey to finding companionship can be challenging but is not impossible.

9. Dealing with Rejection:
- Developing a thick skin to handle rejection and focusing on living your best life without a partner is suggested as a viable option.

10. Encouragement and Hope:
- Many replies offer encouragement, emphasizing that life can improve and that there is hope for happiness and fulfillment post-surgery.