The topic at hand is about navigating the delicate situation of when to disclose having an ostomy to a potential partner. This can be a tricky decision, as it involves balancing honesty with the desire to build a genuine connection. Here are some insights and advice from those who have been through similar experiences:

1. Many people suggest allowing a potential partner to get to know you first. It's often best to share this information after a friendship or connection has been established, but before things become physically intimate.

2. Consider treating the ostomy as just one aspect of your health. If the conversation naturally turns to health topics, you can mention it casually rather than making it a formal announcement.

3. Confidence is key. Present the ostomy as a life-saving event that has contributed to making you the strong person you are today. A confident attitude can help minimize its perceived importance.

4. If someone reacts negatively, it can be seen as a useful way to determine early on if they are not the right person for you.

5. When disclosing, you might start by sharing the history of your illness and how you have successfully coped with it, then introduce the ostomy. This approach can help others view it as a testament to your resilience.

6. You are not obligated to disclose immediately, just as others are not required to share details about their private medical conditions.

7. For many, waiting until just before intimacy feels right. If you anticipate being intimate on the first date, then it might be appropriate to disclose then.

8. Be prepared for a range of reactions. Some people won't mind, others might not understand, and a few may withdraw. Often, rejection is more about their insecurities than your worth.

9. Using humor and openness can help ease any tension. Joking about common ostomy issues, like gas, can show that you are comfortable with yourself and invite curiosity rather than judgment.

10. If you encounter persistent negative experiences, it can affect your confidence. Surrounding yourself with supportive peers can encourage you to continue dating and recognize your personal value.