This topic is about the challenges and considerations of dating with a stoma, the fear of being alone, and the possibility of undergoing reversal surgery. A man who has lived with an ostomy for many years shares his personal experiences and thoughts on these matters. After a long marriage ended in divorce, he finds himself contemplating the future and the possibility of meeting someone new. He is also considering reversal surgery, partly because he feels that having a stoma makes dating more difficult. He hopes to first build friendships that could lead to travel companions and perhaps romance. He encourages open communication, especially from women, about their intentions and feelings towards ostomates.
Here are some pieces of advice and insights shared:
1. Often, the main barrier is early self-consciousness rather than the stoma itself. Building confidence and not pushing potential partners away can help.
2. Relationships often come when the time is right. Stay open-minded, as an ostomy rarely deters the right person from entering your life.
3. Online ostomy communities can be wonderful for making friends, but geographical distance can limit dating opportunities. There are dating sites specifically for ostomates, but the current membership is too spread out to offer many local matches.
4. Fear of worst-case appliance failures can hinder social life. Regular large-scale leaks are not normal, so it's important to review your pouching system, fit, wear time, and supplies if this is a concern.
5. Don’t let "what-ifs" prevent you from pursuing relationships or activities. Many have gone through significant illness to regain health, so it's important to enjoy life.
6. No specific brands, products, or manufacturers were mentioned in the discussion.
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