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41,452 members
Dec 24, 2023

Just someone to talk to

Living with a permanent ostomy can sometimes feel isolating and overwhelming. If you've been managing an ileostomy or colostomy for a long time, you might find yourself feeling lonely or in need of encouragement. Here are some insights and advice that might help:

1. Acceptance & Perspective
- Consider giving your stoma a name or thinking of it as a "little friend" to help with acceptance.
- Remind yourself that your ostomy saved your life, which can help shift your perspective during tough times.
- Understand that mood swings are normal, and it often gets easier after the first year or two.

2. Talk Openly & Seek Connection
- Be open about your ostomy with friends, coworkers, or support groups to reduce feelings of stigma and loneliness.
- Engage with online communities for support at any time, as people in different time zones can offer help when you need it.
- Look for local support groups at ostomy or cancer centers for face-to-face interaction.
- Consider professional counseling to help with trauma, grief, or depression related to your ostomy.

3. Social & Emotional Strategies
- Choose to focus on happiness and live in the moment, celebrating small daily positives.
- Stay connected with others through messages or apps, especially during challenging times like holidays.
- Remember that loneliness is a common struggle, and reaching out can be mutually beneficial.

4. Practical Confidence Builders
- Share your story with confidence; many find that others respond with admiration or curiosity.
- Know that many people have lived fulfilling lives with an ostomy for decades, showing that a long, active life is possible.

5. Encouragement
- Keep in mind the supportive words from others: "Hang in there," "Chin up," and "It will get better with time."
- The community is always here to support you, so reach out whenever you need advice or a listening ear.
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