Dating after ostomy surgery can bring up questions about when to share this personal detail with someone new. Here are some thoughts and advice on how to approach this situation:

- There are two main strategies people often consider:
1. Wait until you feel a genuine connection or trust with the person, similar to how you might handle other private information.
2. Be upfront from the start, either on the first date or even in your dating profile, to avoid wasting time with someone who might not be accepting.

- Some people find a middle ground helpful:
1. Share the information by the second or third date, once you feel a connection.
2. Start by mentioning you had "abdominal surgery" and wear a protective wrap. Gradually explain the ostomy, perhaps framing it as "temporary" initially, and discuss its permanence once they see you manage it well.

- Consider these factors when deciding when to disclose:
1. Your dating goals: If you're looking for something casual, disclose early. For a serious relationship, wait until there's a rapport.
2. Your confidence in managing your stoma: Ensure you can show cleanliness, control odors, and maintain normal activities before discussing it.
3. Others' perceptions: Some might initially see an ostomy as "unhealthy." Letting them see your active lifestyle can help change this view.

- General attitudes to keep in mind:
1. The right partner will accept your ostomy. If they don't, they weren't right for you.
2. Everyone has private matters; focus on mutual discovery rather than sticking to a strict timeline.
3. Be proud of who you are—your stoma is just one part of you.

- Practical tips and alternatives:
1. Mentioning your ostomy in your online dating profile can help filter out those who aren't a good match.
2. Consider dating sites focused on disabilities, where medical devices are more common and accepted.
3. Use humor, confidence, and everyday interactions to show that your ostomy is manageable and not a barrier to intimacy.