The topic at hand is about navigating the dating world with an ostomy. A single man with a colostomy is seeking advice on how to meet potential partners and how to approach the topic of his ostomy with them. Here are some helpful suggestions and insights shared by the community:

- Separate your identity from the appliance. Remember, "You are not your ostomy." Focus on the qualities that made you attractive before the surgery. The ostomy is just a small part of who you are. Embracing self-acceptance and self-love is key to attracting others.

- Lead with who you are, not what you have. When meeting someone new, don't introduce yourself as "an ostomate looking for love." Share personal details about your ostomy only after you've built some rapport, similar to how you would disclose any private health issue. Think of it like selling a car: you highlight the good points first.

- Put yourself in social situations and have fun. Dress well, treat yourself to a nice meal, or join activities like a bowling league, cycling class, church group, sports bar gatherings, volunteer work, or college games. Positivity and a sense of humor are attractive qualities, and people are drawn to those who focus on the positives.

- Consider specialized or supportive venues. There are platforms like Ostodate, a dedicated dating site for people with ostomies. This forum also has a dating section. Attending a local ostomy support group can be great for building friendships and confidence.

- Persistence beats rejection. Some partners may walk away for various reasons, including the ostomy. Keep meeting new people until you find the right match. Many people report that partners often "don’t mind in the slightest."

- Two differing—but both valid—approaches to disclosure:
1. Disclose later: Build a connection first, then share your ostomy. Most people who already like you will stay.
2. Disclose early: Adopt a "take me as I am or watch me as I go" attitude, which fosters trust and screens out those who can't handle it. Choose the approach that suits your personality and comfort level.

- Insights from women in the discussion: Women often look for humor, passion, kindness, and supportiveness more than an ostomy-free body. "The ostomy isn’t a big deal unless you make it one."

- Build self-reliance—confidence is attractive. Learn to change and manage your own appliance, as it boosts self-esteem and reduces the fear of being alone. A tough-love reminder: unless physically incapable, relying on a partner to change your bag can appear needy and may hurt your self-confidence in the long run.

- Inspirational reminders: Quotes from figures like Maya Angelou, Gilda Radner, and John Wooden emphasize the importance of persistence, authenticity, grit, and the attractiveness of humor.