When you have an ostomy, navigating new romantic relationships can feel a bit tricky, especially when it comes to deciding the right time to share this part of your life with someone new. Here are some thoughts and advice from others who have been in similar situations:

1. Timing for Disclosure
- Consider sharing about your ostomy when the relationship starts to feel serious or when things are moving towards physical intimacy.
- Some people choose to disclose on the first or third date to avoid feeling dishonest and to quickly identify those who are understanding.
- If the relationship is casual and feelings are not deep, it might be okay to wait. However, as emotions grow, it's important to be open about significant aspects of your life, including your ostomy.

2. How to Have the Conversation
- Keep it simple: explain that you had a serious illness, the surgery was life-saving, and invite any questions they might have.
- Reassure them that it doesn’t affect sexual function.
- Let them know it’s okay if they need time to process; those who care will stay.
- Remember, confidence in yourself can set a positive tone for the conversation.

3. Tips for First Shower or Nudity
- Consider using a "stretch natural color band" to cover the pouch. It can help make the appliance less noticeable and ease any discomfort during intimate moments.
- You can personalize these bands to match your clothing or mood if you enjoy sewing.

4. Identifying Compatible Partners
- Early disclosure can help you quickly identify if someone is not supportive, saving you time and emotional energy.
- It's beneficial to know early on if someone might not stick around during tough times.

5. Embracing Your Ostomy
- Remember, your ostomy is just one part of who you are, not your entire identity.
- Many people have found that partners who truly care will continue to find them attractive, and there are plenty of stories of successful relationships and marriages following early disclosure.