PTSD. We reference it often, attempt to understand it, deny we experience it and sometimes, some of us feel shamed by our experiences with it. If we take it apart, the P is simple; after. T and S can go together unless we can be Traumatized without feeling any Stress. Is that possible? The D doesn't belong at all! IMHO it would be a Disorder for one to be emotionally, psychologically, even physically imune to the trauma suffered throughout their stoma experience. The traumas we suffered from the diagnosis, remedies like getting our body parts rearranged or removed, wearing a bag, not to mention the possibility of Chemo, radiation, more surgery and stuff we just want to forget, cannot be ignored by our psyches regardless of our physical strength. Stuff happened to us and we don't know how our brains and the systems they control can handle it. It's said, “Whatever doesn't kill us makes us stronger”. I don't ascribe to that phylosophy; wish I did. I think we could've been damaged by some traumas and might have actually lost some strength.
Our entire experience beat the heck out of us and we need to heal. We can watch the healing process from our surgeries even if we're left with a scar. We can't see our guts anymore, no more bleeding and it doesn't hurt. We can't observe the beating our brain cavities experienced and know very little about the healing process. I know there're drugs and talk therapy and I hope we take advantage of it. My own experience with those remedies wasn't so great.
Obviously I can't offer a cure but, a couple things helped me at least a little. I wondered, “Why me?”. The simple answer is “Because”. I felt sorry for myself a few times and decided it was OK to feel that way for a bit. I realized some folks had it way worse than me and that realization did absolutely nothing to make me feel better. I thanked the “Whomever” I survived and can communicate with folks like you here at MAO.
Mike