Reflecting on Work, Health, and Forgiveness

Dear Bloggy,

Today has been an okay day, I think... lol... so far anyway. I work four and a half hours a day, down from nine like I used to. I hope they are not getting sick of me having to be on modified duty. I have been with the company for 11 years, and I have a lot of great friendships with so many of the people there. I always have doctor's notes to cover my ass, so to speak. lol It still worries me, though. I have a lot of anxiety over so many different things.

I am like a man; I tend to overanalyze EVERYTHING and have always been that way. Now it seems that I can't help doing it because of everything I have dealt with. I have HUGE trust issues with the doctors too.

I often wonder if Dr. Malpractice ever thinks about me and what he has done to put me in the position I'm in? Does he regret leaving me there like he did? Does he ever wish he could go back and redo things, not for HIS benefit but for MINE? I highly doubt it. I forgive him, even though he will never ask for my forgiveness, I give it to him anyway. I cannot live my life hate-filled and spending my time and energy hating a person. No matter what they have done to me. I have to forgive as God forgives me.

I hope today is a great day and my pain gets better, and I wish the same thing for each one of my ostomates today.

Bye Bloggy, I have to go to work and serve the Military. lol :)

I do that too .... always preparing for the worst case scenario in my head .... you are not alone! Rach xx

I do that too .... always preparing for the worst case scenario in my head .... you are not alone! Rach xx

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