Well, like the title says - I finally was able to start back to work today. It was great, although I think my brain is still hibernating or secretly watching TV. Oh well, I'm sure that I will get back into the swing in no time. My only downer of the day was that I may not be going back to the job that I had, and that bums me out. It took me years to train the sales guys I work with - took a lot of nagging and bitching, etc. and of course, the company has made the job so much easier now - I want to enjoy the cream, the ease of the new systems, damn it!!! LOL. I am so lucky to have a job to go back to, not sure how I would have coped with no job - perish the thought. I thought that I would be completely dead on my feet, but I'm still jazzed. Hope that I can sleep, or my poor brain will be even worse off. So it's half days for 2 weeks and then full bore. I'm hoping that when the plastic surgeon does the skin graft to cover and heal the wound, everything goes smoothly. I would hate having to take any more time off for this stupid, stupid, stupid %&%&%&&__()() wound. Also, Stefant the stoma was so well behaved today, no singing, no squirting like a maniac, or acting like a Riverdance extra; he was such a good little boy that I am thinking of ways to reward him. Hope everybody had a good day, if not a great one.
Congratulations on your first half-day back to work! And that Stefant behaved himself! You will do great... keep forever positive!
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About seven years ago, just about every aspect of my life was ostomy related. From the moment I was told an ostomy might be needed until some months down the road I existed as a person afflicted with a colostomy. I feared someone other than my immediate family might find out I had a bag. Ugh! What could be worse? Suppose it filled real fast when I was out with no place to hide and take care of myself. God forbid should it leak in church! Suppose I roll over on it in bed. I was a lesser creature, destined to a life of emotional anguish and physical routines different from most of the rest of the world. I felt like a freak. Then I found folks like you guys here, read your stuff, really “listened” to what you had to say and I began looking at things differently. We know perception is everything and I began to understand how good things were relative to what they could’ve been. So many folks had it so much worse than I did. That didn’t make my discomfort go away but it exposed how fortunate I was to be dealing with my stuff and not their’s. I felt a little guilt, maybe selfishness but quickly forgave myself by understanding I just wasn’t smart enough to fix my feelings. Then, I wonder what smarts have to do with feelings. My perception was warped so my perspective toward my existence was warped.
I learned over the last few years with the help of lots of folks right here at MAO that I could be better at living just by accepting some facts. It is what it is and so what? It’s not the worst thing to happen to a person.
I think everything is, in some way, related to everything else. I just put the ostomy thing in the back seat and drive forward.
Respectfully,
Mike
Hi Tess, great going getting back to work on your half day. I hope you continue with good health. Pleased to hear that Stefant was behaving well. Good luck for the future in all aspects. Take care, ambies.
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