Considering a Stoma for Continence - Seeking Advice and Experiences

Hi everyone, I'm not an ostomate yet but looking for advice. I have suffered from incontinence for many years. I had a suture rectopexy to correct a rectal prolapse in 2018, but continued to have continence issues. I tried diet, medication, biofeedback/pelvic floor retraining, and got an Interstim implanted in 2020. Lately, it has lost its effectiveness. I am trying to get a referral back to my surgeon to see what can be done, but at this point, I'm so fed up I'm willing to consider a stoma. I've been incontinent for my entire adult life and I just want my dignity back. For those of you who had a stoma for continence, has it improved things for you? Would you recommend it? How did you adjust? Did insurance cover your surgery?

I had the same problems and recently had colostomy surgery on Sept. 13, 2023. After the learning curve, which is short, and feeling better, grab that jacket and go enjoy your new life. There are many products to make your life so much better; ask for samples from all the companies that make products for us. See a stoma nurse and pick their brain for the management of a stoma and the skin around it. Very important info.

Best of luck

Daune

Hello TheYearling.

Welcome to this site where you might find people who have had all sorts of problems leading up to an eventual stoma. 
My own story is similar to yours in that I spent years and many different potential ‘solutions’ to my faecal incontinence, including sacral nerve stimulation(which didn’t work for me). The last straw was when I was diagnosed with an internal anal prolapse, which they tried to pull back and pin to my spine (that didn’t work either).
We all have to figure these things out in our own ways and mine was to consider the problems as ‘mechanical’. A prolapse simply means that the colon is not holding itself in as it should. In my case, they tried whatever they could and it didn’t work. The only thing that ‘worked’ was to wear anal plugs, which gave me about 2-5 minutes to get to a toilet before catastrophe! (Irrigation eased the problem a little, since I did not have so much output.
Eventually, I had had enough and opted for a colostomy (having first ascertained that I would still be able to irrigate post-op). 
Thinking ‘mechanically’, it is so much easier and more hygienic to ‘manage’ incontinence from a position on the front of one’s abdomen than it is from between one’s legs, where gravity gets the upper hand. 
Let’s not pretend that having a stoma is a ‘cure’ for incontinence, it is not!  All it does is offer the opportunity for much more efficient management. It is so much easier to catch faeces in a bag than it is to try to find a toilet in a hurry! –And, if you fail to locate a toilet, a bag is much more ‘convenient’ than faeces all down your legs 
However, there may be other additional benefits such as a diminution of pain in the anus and lower colon. 
Bearing in mind the above, a colostomy has improved the management of my incontinence beyond belief. As and when  I get fed up with the hassle involved, I simply recall how much more hassle it was before the stoma and this puts my mind at rest. 
I would highly recommend a colostomy on the grounds that it is likely that you would be able to irrigate. This empties the colon and offers the opportunity of no output during the day, which makes management even easier.
If you follow my own trajectory, then you should have few problems in adjusting to the stoma. After all, you have had to adjust to the (more severe) problems of anal incontinence whether you wanted to or not.
 As for insurance; Here in the UK we have ‘National Insurance’, which we have paid into all our working lives, and means that treatment and supplies are ‘free’ on the 'National Health Service’ at the point of contact.
Politically, the far right (conservatives) would like to change this so that they can profit from other people’s misery, but so far they have only managed to do so via surreptitious, Machiavellian and covert efforts, which have undermined the NHS to the extent that people (who can afford it) are now taking out private insurance to get treatment quicker. That’s enough politics!
I do hope that you make the ‘right’ decision – if there is such a thing! And I hope that your future becomes more ‘manageable’ than your past.
Keep in touch!
Best wishes

Bill