Farts

Ripping a massive fart into the bag is more satisfying than real farts. Tell me I'm wrong.

Well... I call them Barts. Since I don't pass gas from my fanny... only from my baggie... it is a Bartie. Delayed release comes in handy too.

Well, they don't smell, but they sure can make some funny noises 😄 😆 🤣

It's just nice when you feel one brewing and it comes out. I do miss being able to push them out on command.

"Book 'em and push 'em, Danno."

Says Kojak. 😉

But we can bag burp on command. Gives new meaning to "silent but deadly."

🎵Eew, that smell...🎶🎵Can't you smell that smell? 🎵That smell of burping bags in public🎶🎵

I am laughing so much here. Your word for your bottom has a totally different meaning in Australia. I cannot get the image out of my head. Regards, IGGIE

I guess you were on a roll. I love all the references to old shows I used to watch, and you just make me laugh. I can't thank you enough.

OK, now I'm curious… What does the name mean in Australia?

I've never burped my bag. I don't get much gas, but when I do, it feels nice to unload. Haha

🤗 Thanks, Linda.

🎵 You ain't seen nothing yet 🎶

🙃

Well... you are one lucky son of a gun... because if I could fill my fuel tank with my own (gas), I'd travel the country. 🚘

Google it.

OK, now you've got me curious. What word for your 'bottom' are you referring to? There are so many! Or are you meaning the word 'bottom' itself, which also refers to the male on the 'bottom' in male-on-male sex?

Farts feel good whether they come out of your bum or your tum, but they are more entertaining now. Maybe it's something to do with the acoustics when they enter the bag!

I never met a fart I didn't like.

No wait... I never smelled a fart I liked. No... that's not right either...

Hmm 🤨... I never dealt a fart anyone liked. Bingo!

Downloading now. 3...2...1...

A famous playwright once opined: A fart by any other name would be just as sweet...

To fart, or not to fart... that is the question.

Throughout history, farts were there, leading the way. Thus these memorable quotes:

In 1775, Founding Father Patrick Henry proclaimed: "Give me farts, or give me death!"

Nathan Hale expressed: I only regret that I have but one fart to lose for my country.

Thomas Riley Marshall achieved a small measure of immortality with his quip, "What this country needs is a really good five-cent fart."

In 17th century France, Henry IV reputedly wished that each of his peasants would enjoy "a fart in his pot every Sunday."

Yes, fellow ostomates, the gas we all know and "love to hate" has a splendid history.

So, warrior... get busy.

Amen to that

A fanny in the UK means a vagina. I guess in the U.S. it means bottom.