Discussing Intimacy Challenges in the LGBT Community

Replies
17
Views
611
josephmcelroy472
Dec 31, 2024 12:43 am

I never see any posts or questions about how gay men and women handle intimate times. I just happen to be bisexual. It is very embarrassing to be with another man because the bag is right there in your face.

eefyjig
Dec 31, 2024 3:14 am

Hi Joseph, I’m thinking higher waisted underwear with strategic cutouts would solve the exposed bag problem. I have high waisted crotchless panties that cover my bag and never need to come off.

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HenryM

If I was a relative newbie with an ostomy, I have no doubt that this site would be very helpful to me.  The members are quick to respond to questions and issues and they are filled with experience.  When I joined, I already had a lifetime with an ostomy, so I just regard it as a place to meet and communicate with other folks similarly situated.  Either way, it is a good site.

warrior
Dec 31, 2024 3:22 am

You never see any posts? Where have you looked, my friend?

You are new here. Gotta navigate the forums.

There are posts. There are real people here just like you, wanting just like you.

Fear not.

There is a forum for the community. Look it up.

There are both gay men and women writing in like you are.

They meet each other on this forum or the other which is above, in the icons.

We don't hear from them afterwards because they connect, talk, do their thing like we do.

Past Member
Dec 31, 2024 3:38 am
Lilmesican
Dec 31, 2024 5:24 am

Hi, 

I'm ready to have these conversations. 

 

 

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Ben38
Dec 31, 2024 5:45 am

Lgbt or not when you think about it anal is the only difference between us....just flick bag out the way same as women do going down on a man with a bag or vice versa....Time that's we all need to get our confidence back then nothings a problem 

warrior
Dec 31, 2024 8:53 am

Well said, Ben.

There are also a lot of intimate clothing or accessories that will, in fact, take your mind off what might be either staring you in the face or flapping in the bang of things.

Being butt naked in front of your partner... seems old school.

And very scary. Gotta think outside the box. Be creative even if it's your first poke.

AlexT
Dec 31, 2024 10:46 am

One of the best/funniest posts ever on this site was about your question. The question was about how to stop the bag from slapping your partner on the forehead. 😂 Sorry, no help to your question, it just made me remember reading that post when I was new to the site. I think everyone is adult enough to figure out how to get around the bag, good luck. 

Axl
Dec 31, 2024 11:12 am

I remember that one .. 😂🤣😂

IGGIE
Dec 31, 2024 12:21 pm

G-Day eefyjig, I now see you in a new light. You just made my day. Regards, IGGIE

warrior
Dec 31, 2024 1:44 pm

Oh behave! 

eefyjig
Dec 31, 2024 5:33 pm

Oh my, you're making me blush!

bobwilson5999
Dec 31, 2024 8:47 pm

Try a body wrap or maybe a horizontal Stealth Belt.

Beachboy
Jan 01, 2025 8:28 am

There have been many posts on this site about gay issues with an ostomy. Gay or straight... We have the same issues of body image and intimacy. And the practical issues... how to prevent the bag from slapping a forehead. Ok... funny... but a real concern.

Ask a specific question. You will get specific answers. Don't be shy about being explicit.

Preventing bag slapping: Eat a couple of marshmallows 45 to 60 minutes before showtime (helps slow output). Change to a new bag before the pounding begins. Fold the new bag in half, once upwards. Secure the folded bag with Hypafix tape, or if you're using a 2-piece wafer/bag system, use 2 IGGIE clips to secure the bag on both sides of the flange. (IGGIE clips and Hypafix tape are explained in detail in many other posts, just gotta do a little research). The folded bag will shield the stoma from view. The bag will not swing... no matter how much you try.

Past Member
Jan 01, 2025 3:54 pm
Anne_Shirley
Jan 03, 2025 10:40 pm

That was my thought as well. It doesn’t exactly matter who is sleeping with who, we are all dealing with it the same when it comes to intimacy.

beredis802
Jan 30, 2025 5:53 pm

You're right—discussions about intimacy challenges in the LGBT community don’t always get enough attention, even though they’re just as important. Being bisexual and navigating intimate moments with men can definitely come with some unique concerns, and feeling self-conscious is totally understandable. Right now, focusing on yourself is crucial. One thing that might help is taking your time to communicate and build confidence in those situations. Sometimes, engaging in conversations beforehand and setting the right mood can make things feel more natural. Online spaces can also be helpful for easing into things at your own pace—platforms like site for hookup allow you to connect with others while boosting confidence through thoughtful exchanges. You're definitely not alone in this!

warrior
Feb 08, 2025 6:55 pm

"Thoughtful exchanges?" Is that what they are calling random sex with random partners these days? 🤭😋😆🤔.