Sex after surgery

How as the dating scene been for everyone else yes including sex I had a partner before my operation but after the operation some vile vile words came out of his mouth I won’t go into detail and bore everyone but it knocked my self confidence and the way I looked at myself I’m now very wary of letting someone else see me in a sexual way

Most people have a hard time dealing with it. Especially men.

Women seem to able to cope with their love one having a "Bag".

My wife was one of those who couldn't handle it. Even though I had Chrons disease for forty years, now the problem was their for everyone to see.

Well did they really love you in the first place???

I think I'm better off!😂

You'll be just fine.

I feel badly for the next person he gets involved with.

There's only 1 man for the job you need some Bruno Mars therapy! Listen to 'just the way you are' turn up the volume stand in front of the mirror and sing along until you believe every word.....let's be honest from seeing your photo your a hottie ain't no one in there right mind going to turn you down!.....Nope never had any problems had my ileo since I was 19 had 1 night stands in my younger days and relationship its never been a problem.

Hey there - don’t let having a stoma define whom you are. It’s definitely his loss. Go out and enjoy. Here’s to making every day count 🍷

My Ostomy Journey: Keyla | Hollister

I'm one of those lucky ones who didn't lose their spouse. She stayed by my side through all of it.

I, on the other hand, have issues when sounds interrupt the mood. Wearing a nylon wrap is a must!

When we accept ourselves ..... others too will accept us for who we are.

However, all of that said, some folk will have an issue - but that's their PAth and their perspective ...... it can be for some a person with a visual element that challeges their viewing confort nterupts with some comfort zones of theirs - NOT YOURS - and, in fairness, some, whilst remaining loving tDO have issues ..... including all sorts of stuff ...... I feel sorry for those folk, especially for the future of their partners . for IMHE - rarely do such folk end up maming the transistion ...... and sadly, ultimately it is an issue that will raise its head for them many times over - in various guises.

BE HAPPY and try to feel comfy BEing as opposed to concerning yourself with other's txic issues.

Best Wishes

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Jayne ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I'm sorry to hear he treated you like that. Honestly, I think you may be better off without him. He sounds like a real jerk.

I haven't dated at all since getting the ostomy 11 years ago. I went through a horrible divorce and I was too shattered to even try. The fear of having to explain the ostomy was too much for me, because I already experienced a lot of hurtful comments and attitudes from people close to me. More recently I have been open to the idea of dating other ostomates. Have you tried the dating on here? For me it's difficult because everyone is so far away from me, so even if I've tried to meet people, I haven't had any dates yet. It seems like there are more people in the UK by percentage and you aren't as spread out as we Americans are.
I wish you the best of luck and hope you find someone worthy of you.

Sex after surgery?..🤔..hmm..don't u wanna wait until yur at least back in yur own room? Curtains closed? 😃😉

It's unbelievable how mean people can be.

Warrior that's all you're going to say? Lol

Had UC for 32 years. Married in process of moving out/divorce. I had my surgery 2 years after marriage. I was talked down to like scum of the earth. I had 2 sons as well. At surgery I had a 15 yo and a 2 yo. All together 3 surgeries 2 back to back. Nurse since high school and later got LPN. Took a fast paced course supposed to last 18 months n completed it in 12 months. My marriage should have ended around year 7-8 but my husband is a control freak. Cameras up everywhere. Can’t shop due to jealousy issues but he loved to bash me at home all the while teaching my kids it’s ok to treat mom this way. Threatened to kill me n himself n whole family too many times to count. Now 24.5 years later it’s not any better. Put out of marriage bed over 13 years due to him thinking because of my ileostomy I was gross, disgusting, less than n so on.

I plainly came to a decision a year ago nearly because I’m on SSD and he worked 2-3 years out of our marriage was leaching on me so he could lay on his butt!

I told him past while now I was going to pay 25% of bills because there were 3 able bodied men 2 went to tech school n one got a Bachelors Degree in 2 areas.

Got hell for it but I don’t give af anymore. I did my part raising my kids dealing through illness of UC and two separate ileostomies. I cried. I’ve wept while they slept. I’m just done n over it!!! I don’t think anyone without being an ostomate can deal with me. There might be a few good men out there without one that don’t mind but I don’t care to look. This is just a sampling of my problems not my entire story. Too long n no one cares. I want someone who is kind, honest, genuine, can relate that has been there done that. As far as sex goes I didn’t have a problem because my pouch is grey with a peel place that’s covered and is me now. An extension of who I am n if no one can step up to the plate and be the man I need and deserve after my divorce then it is what it is! I’m focusing on me now. Nursing license lapsed so bought NCLEX book to study so I can go back to work part time. Have to pay $336 to for test to be reinstated, pay penalty for license lapsing n pass background check. Then taking some additional classes to be a wound care assistant/associate. May take some injection classes to work in spas and plastics practices. Pay is better I heard if I take dialysis classes. Who knows. One day at a time, breathe n exhale cause I too have been through literal hell.

Everyone has their problems but mine has been lack of empathy for the mother who gave you a son n never changed his ways. I’m burying it as past n looking for a better future not just for myself but to all who felt abandoned, alone, trapped in any relationship or situation having to do with surgery and in need of healing. ❤️‍🩹 Your not alone as many on here can attest to. Just learn to be good to yourself when no one else is. Love yourself enough to know your worth n you are enough.

God bless all!

Kimmied

U want photos, Bob? Instead? Smack!👋

Over yur head, u mean? U talk too much, George?, while in the boom boom room? Eh? 😆.