This topic is about dealing with a challenging situation involving a 67-year-old mother-in-law who has had a colostomy for 15 years. She often leaves stool splashes around the bathroom, which is causing tension in the household. The person sharing this story is worried about the impact on their marriage and is seeking advice on whether this is normal and how to address it.
Here are some helpful suggestions and insights:
1. Reduce toilet splash:
- Stand close to the toilet bowl and place a few sheets of toilet paper in the water before emptying the pouch to minimize splashing.
- Try kneeling on one knee or sitting back and leaning forward while emptying the pouch. These positions can help direct the output downward more gently.
2. Consider equipment change:
- Switching to disposable, single-use ostomy bags might help. These bags don't need to be emptied over the toilet, which can prevent messes, though they are more expensive.
3. Hygiene and responsibility:
- It's not typical for colostomy users to make such a mess. People with long-term experience often report no issues like this.
- Provide cleaning supplies to the mother-in-law and require her or her son to clean up after each incident. This might help address the behavior.
4. Behavioral and emotional factors:
- The repeated mess could be a sign of underlying issues such as anger, attention-seeking, or depression. Counseling or therapy might be beneficial if these are suspected.
5. Relationship and household boundaries:
- Involve the husband by showing him the situation or discussing it with him directly to ensure he understands the seriousness and supports finding a solution.
- If cooperation is not achieved, consider setting firm boundaries, such as seeking professional caregiving or exploring alternate living arrangements.