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41,427 members
Mar 14, 2011

Let's talk about acceptance

This topic is all about finding acceptance and living well with an ostomy. It's a welcoming space where people with ostomies can share their experiences, make friends, and support each other without feeling the need to hide. Here are some helpful pieces of advice and insights shared by the community:

1. Professional help can be very beneficial. Many find that regular sessions with therapists or counselors help them overcome depression, trauma, and fears after surgery.

2. Staying hydrated is crucial, especially for those with an ileostomy. It's a good idea to keep water or electrolyte drinks like Powerade handy, particularly when you're out and about, as dehydration can lead to hospital visits.

3. Get to know your personal food list. Introduce new foods slowly, keep track of what causes issues, and remember that everyone's "safe" foods are different.

4. Keep an eye on your overall health. Using a home blood-pressure cuff can help you monitor any fluctuations you might experience after surgery. Be sure to report any persistent changes to your doctor.

5. Boost your self-image by writing down your positive qualities. Throw away any negative thoughts and remind yourself that you are not "second-class."

6. Make use of all available support channels:
- Online forums, private messaging, and chat rooms for full members
- Local ostomy associations and volunteer programs
- Pen-pals within the community

7. Acceptance is a personal journey. Some people embrace their ostomy quickly, while others may only tolerate it, and that's perfectly okay. Denial can slow down healing, so facing your feelings honestly is important.

8. If considering reversal surgery, weigh the risks and benefits carefully. Success rates can be high, but failures do happen. Factors like age, overall health, and the surgeon's experience are important. For some, living with a stoma permanently is preferable to undergoing another major surgery.

9. Relationships might change. Sometimes unsupportive partners may leave, but remember, this reflects on them, not you. Surround yourself with people who appreciate and value you.

10. Life can return to normal. Many members have gone back to work, volunteer activities, hobbies like motorcycle racing, traveling, and even grand-parenting, showing that an ostomy doesn't define you.

11. Remember the reason for your ostomy. Whether it was due to cancer, diverticulitis, ulcerative colitis, an accident, or another cause, your ostomy saved your life. Choosing life is the ultimate act of acceptance.
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