This topic is about managing the anxiety and mental health challenges that can arise when deciding whether to keep an ileostomy or undergo a reversal surgery. The person sharing their experience is dealing with these issues after having an ileostomy for a year following surgery for stage-4 colorectal cancer. They are seeking advice and insights from others who have faced similar decisions.

Here are some helpful points and advice shared by others:

- Face-to-face counseling is often more effective than phone consultations because the personal connection can make a big difference.

- If your ileostomy is functioning well and your quality of life is good, it might be worth considering keeping it. Many reversals can lead to complications like high-frequency, painful bowel movements, and sometimes a failed reversal means another surgery to return to an ileostomy.

- It's important to know how much of your colon remains, as the success of a reversal can depend on the length and condition of your large bowel.

- To help with decision-making, try making a pros and cons list and take your time reviewing it. Reading about others' experiences with successful and failed reversals can also be insightful, and don't hesitate to reach out to them for more details.

- Have a detailed conversation with your surgeon to discuss the risks, expected outcomes, and backup plans.

- Mental health can be affected by medical PTSD or C-PTSD, especially after major surgeries, cancer, and ongoing uncertainty. Changes in gut-brain signaling after surgery or chemotherapy can also impact anxiety and mood.

- Peer support from others who have been through similar experiences can be invaluable, but it's best to combine it with professional help when possible. Consider looking into specialized GI-psychology programs that understand ostomy-specific issues.

- A resource that might be helpful is the mind.org.uk page on PTSD and Complex PTSD.

- Remember to take care of yourself. Healing, both physically and emotionally, is a long and uneven journey. Allow yourself to feel vulnerable and be gentle with yourself. Stress, expectations, and the desire to protect loved ones can add to your inner struggles.

- Rest, pacing yourself, and accepting help are important parts of recovery.