This topic is a lighthearted take on how someone used their ostomy surgery as an excuse to avoid household chores. The person shares their experience of taking a break from tasks like vacuuming, washing dishes, and carrying groceries, all while claiming to suffer from "staple pain" and "surgical fatigue." Their spouse initially went along with it, but eventually found clever ways to get them back into the swing of things. Here are some amusing insights from their story:

1. For the first six months after surgery, the person managed to avoid chores by citing various post-surgery discomforts, which their spouse accepted at first.

2. The spouse eventually caught on and started packing groceries in light bags, requiring multiple trips from the garage to the kitchen, making it harder to avoid helping.

3. They also bought a self-propelled vacuum cleaner, pointing out that it required no effort to push, thus eliminating another excuse.

4. The person humorously warns new ostomates to enjoy their "housework vacation" while it lasts, as their own carefree days were numbered once their spouse took action.

This story serves as a playful reminder that while recovery is important, the break from chores might not last forever!