This topic is about a person seeking advice on how to support their partner, who has a temporary ileostomy following rectal-cancer surgery. The partner is struggling with intimacy due to concerns about the ostomy bag, which is affecting their relationship. Here are some helpful insights and advice shared by others:

1. Give Time & Space
- It's important to remember that recovery is still in the early stages. Many people find that body image and libido improve within 3-6 months post-surgery. Patience and unconditional support are crucial during this time.

2. Acceptance vs. Reversal Expectations
- While hoping for a reversal is natural, it's important to be prepared for any outcome. Reversals can sometimes be delayed or not go as planned. Encouraging balanced research can help manage expectations.

3. Communication & Emotional Support
- Keep reassuring your partner that your love and attraction remain unchanged. Ask what kind of touch feels comfortable for him now. Suggesting couple or individual counseling might also be beneficial, even if he is initially resistant.

4. Gradual, Non-Sexual Touch
- Start with simple gestures like hand-holding or light massages. Allow him to set the pace. Some people find that being present while their partner self-pleasures can help reduce pressure and gradually rebuild intimacy.

5. Practical Intimacy Aids
- Using ostomy wraps or band covers can help keep the pouch discreet. Timing intimacy for when the pouch is empty, such as in the morning or after fasting, can also help. Foods like marshmallows or plain rice, or medications like Imodium (with medical approval), can temporarily slow output.

6. Address Possible Erectile Issues
- If there are concerns about erectile function, consulting a urologist might be helpful. They can assess for any pelvic-nerve trauma or medication effects and suggest treatments like injections or devices.

7. Body-Image Reframing
- Reading positive stories about others with ostomies can help normalize the experience. A recommended book is "It’s in the Bag and Under the Covers" by Brenda Elsagher. Online support groups and local associations can also provide a sense of community and confidence.

8. Don’t Neglect the Partner’s Needs
- It's important for the partner to express her own emotional and physical needs calmly. A healthy relationship considers the needs of both individuals.