2011, A Year Not to Remember

My experience started in Feb this year after being diagnosed with diverticular disease. I had the operation without a stoma being fitted, but unfortunately, 12 days after, the join internally burst. I then had a fistula for 6 months until the site was strong enough to re-operate. I had the re-op in Sept and all went well, but this time I have a stoma, although reversible, not for 1-2 years. I also now have a small hernia as well. Other than my own stoma nurses and consultant, I have had no contact with other people who have been in this position.
I have ups and downs, but I think I am apprehensive about returning to work. Don't get me wrong, I am dying to return, but I work with the public in a small environment, and 70% of my job is on the shop floor around customers.
Also, although I am single, I somewhat feel that that side of things will stay that way, as it's a hard thing to share with someone and expect them to be able to deal with it.
That's a narrowed-down version of my story, but my first day, first post, and Hello to All.

Your decision to post here was a good one.  You'll soon learn there are so many people who have had experiences similar to yours and they'll help you.  Be patient and ask all the questions you want.  You're in the right place.  Mike

There are lots of nice people when you catch them in the chat room, but sometimes it's like a ghost town and you have to wait for them to rise from the dead. And bang, they are all back and you can exchange emails, so you have better contact.

Hey welcome
Thanks for the photo, how about filling in your profile? I had a similar situation to you and remember well where you are at right now. Nerves is a totally understandable way to feel right now. But you will be fine and in no time you will be wondering what you were so worried about.
As far as dating goes.... I confess I haven't been brave enough just yet, but I will.

At any rate, we are all here to help. Just yell.
Trish

Hi,

What a year you have had indeed. I hope that things are getting better now and you can have a healthy and settled Christmas. I just wanted to say that following my illy being fitted, I returned to work 3 months post-op. I was 28 at the time and worked with the public. Work seemed to be more a part of my identity than I had thought it was, and being away from work and friends, especially with my new illy, made everything harder. Although it was initially challenging, I quickly settled and found my own routine of what I could eat and when I could eat it - depending on my schedule. No one knew about it (except one close friend and a manager) and no one suspected anything. This helped me realize that no one else could see it and no one was bothered (because paranoia made me feel that way). My manager was also really supportive and flexible.

Going back to work was the best thing - it stopped me sitting at home feeling sorry for myself and made me get on with life. I know it seems daunting but I really found going back (on a slow return to work timetable) great for my psychological health.

I can't offer any dating advice as I was fortunate to be in a relationship when I had my illy, and am still in the same relationship. However, we had only been 'dating' for three months when I had it fitted and the illy made no difference whatsoever. It really does not seem to matter when we are intimate and the more comfortable I am with it, the more comfortable my partner is. We often joke about it.

Hope this offers something useful to you. ....