From Toilet to Traveler: My Journey as an Ostomate

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ZaliBee

Strange how I had dreams of traveling and doing all manner of adventurous things once I retired. But, fate and God always seem to have an interesting sense of humor. I dreamed of those things but I knew I would never do them. How could I? I was on the blasted toilet upwards of 33 times a day and the only way that I was going on a cruise, or white water rafting, was if I could strap a toilet to my butt (laughs)

But, one day, one wonderful day, I got so sick that I was rushed to the ER and received a diagnosis of FAP. WTF is FAP!?! Well, strangely enough, my father had FAP and never told us. We always thought that it was some horrific accident from Vietnam and he just didn't want to talk about it. I still want to beat him senseless when I think of all of those years of needless suffering. But that's water under the bridge even though he gets no more Christmas presents from me for a little while longer. Yea... I'm pissed.

Anyway, the first weeks after my surgery were hell, but after the healing time was over and I started actually getting out of the house I realized that.... Damn, this is pretty cool!!

I can go out and hang out with friends, go to Starbucks and sit for hours. Go to the movies. WOW! I can even go to the beach! I ran around like a crazed woman going everywhere and even clubbing now and then (no alcohol though) Talk about liberation... man o man.

Right about that time, the VA Administration, in their wisdom, finally gave me my disability rating and life got even better. I decided to shoot for the moon. I had dreamed of traveling since I got out of the Army and became a wage slave but now that I was officially disabled and actually forbidden to work, it was on!

I'm going to visit every castle in Europe, I want to visit Pompeii, the Blue Mosque in Turkey, the Parthenon wheee. So far I've made it to Mexico, South America and at the moment I'm in Belize. My goal is to dive the Blue Hole by this summer but learning to scuba is a lot harder than it looks. I'm getting it though. (proud pose!)

Strangely enough, I can swim all day and my wafer doesn't lift. I don't know why, and I'm not questioning it.

Hmm.... should I try parasailing? I'll definitely have to think that one over, they get up there pretty high. LOL Anyway, Belize until the fall and then a 2-month trip to Europe before I have to schlepp back to Jacksonville for my 6-month checkup. Blah... Duodenum polyps are interfering with my plans. They want me in every 6 months to try and get out a few more of them each time.

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funnygurl

I have been to Belize a couple of times. Love it there. You go, girl!

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ZaliBee

Belize is awesome, isn't it? I can't believe that it took me so long to visit. My Facebook is going to explode with all of the pictures. LOL!

funnygurl

Have you been to Lamanai? It is spectacular. We also did the Jaguar Preserve tour with a guide named Basilio who worked out of the Maya Beach Hotel and he was amazing. The zoo is also really great.

garfish

Almost bought some property up north of the Cut. Keep going forward, never straight.

 
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Past Member

Try the parasailing!

ZaliBee

I'm definitely going to do the Zoo and the Preserve and I'm considering parasailing but maybe I'll do the Zipline first and build my courage up for the parasailing (laughs). But first, we have to find the northerners who dragged weird weather down here. It's actually been a little chilly and cloudy for the last few days. Water's still warm but you'll shiver when you get out and the breeze hits you. No thanks!

Rizzo

Let me know if you're planning to be in Europe in August. I'll be going over to Holland, doing some real parachuting again. Round canopy military 'chutes. Come and give it a try?

vikinga

Ok. I give up. What is FAP? I tried looking it up but got some rather ....uh....lurid meanings.

Past Member

You are inspiring! Wish I had more time to travel. Keep up the great work!

ZaliBee

FAP = Familial Adenomatous Polyposis. It's genetic and a bastard. LOL. Hmmm. Now, I cannot think of any reason I will ever voluntarily leap out of a perfectly good airplane. But, I'll watch!

ZaliBee

Lurid... ha ha ha! I googled it and couldn't stop laughing. OMG. Fap Fap Fap (giggles more) Thank you Vikinga, I needed that laugh.

kims

Good for you!

redrockhiker

What product do you use that stays on while you swim all day?

garfish

Opposite tape

ZaliBee

I've never had to use anything to keep my appliance on. I'll swim today and it stays glued in place for about 3 days before I worry about it.

garfish

Have you seen the Coloplast barrier strips?

ZaliBee

No, I never had to buy any of that stuff. Garfish

ZaliBee

Okay! Never ever eat street food in Guatemala! I just spent 2 of the worst weeks of my life getting over a case of paratyphoid fever. Booo! Anyway, of course my docs at the VA demand my presence in their office immediately (laughs). So I'll be returning to the States on Thursday. This is not the end of my adventure. Oh Nay Nay! I already booked the next leg of my journey and will be in Belgium in June. I got a 2-month continuous pass on the Eurail and I'll be much more careful about what I eat in the future.

Past Member

BA, take me with you! --- You rule, going all Indiana Jones adventure/explorer on everybody! I would too... if I won the lottery and got money to travel. :P

ZaliBee

Shame on me for not updating this thing in so long!

Ok, more on the adventures of Zalibee the Bumblebee. My passport has cool stamps in it now, but the adventure continues. I had a little setback which had me whining like a twit, but we evolve, we adjust. I had to make a choice between eating food, and traveling, so I've chosen to travel. Carrying a bunch of liquid supplements was an issue though. How do you schlepp 40lbs of drinky-food in a backpack and still go anywhere?

You don't!

You buy a boat so that you can stock it with as much drinky-food as you need and you keep it moving. So, I bought a boat. Wheeee!

I had so much fun last summer. I sailed the East Coast, and the gulfside of Florida. Now, I'm docked down in Marathon Florida as I work on my little island hopping baby. The plan was to zip over to the Bahamas by April but that's on hold for now. Ergh, the duodenum finally has to come out. The trip isn't over, it's just pushed back a teensy bit. I'm pushing them to get me in to surgery by April so that I can recover over the Hurricane season. I plan on raising my sails by November and catching the wind.

The doctors spent the last year or so trying to figure out why I can't eat solid food without getting chest pain and a heart rate of 150 and you know what? Who cares anymore?!?

I can either sit around while they send me through test after test after test and never figure it out, or I can get back to seeing the world. I choose to see the world.

New Normal? = Drinky-Food!!

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