A SMELL FROM HELL.
The worst aroma I have smelt
was from the stoma ‘neath my belt.
What we knew about that smell
‘twas like a poo right out of hell.
It started like a stinking fart
but blew the blinking bag apart.
Of all the stinks I’ve burst before
Methinks this was the worst for sure.
Just everyone from miles around
must have heard the resounding sound.
But when comparing sound to smell
then smell we found we could not quell.
When people try to keep away
this smell is sly and means to stay.
It’s quick to stick to everything
and also clings to anything.
It seemed to creep around the place
then deemed to leap up in your face.
And no one knows just why it chose
to make its way straight to the nose.
I s’ppose the nose one must conclude
was predisposed to just protrude.
We sniff the odour from below
so up the nose the whiff will flow.
So this much I can guarantee
there’s no such smell to this degree.
It’s reputation as a stench
is said to make whole nations wrench.
I think those with an ostomy
will know this stink because to me
they may have started out this way
and lived to fart another day.
B. Withers 2013
The worst aroma I have smelt
was from the stoma ‘neath my belt.
What we knew about that smell
‘twas like a poo right out of hell.
It started like a stinking fart
but blew the blinking bag apart.
Of all the stinks I’ve burst before
Methinks this was the worst for sure.
Just everyone from miles around
must have heard the resounding sound.
But when comparing sound to smell
then smell we found we could not quell.
When people try to keep away
this smell is sly and means to stay.
It’s quick to stick to everything
and also clings to anything.
It seemed to creep around the place
then deemed to leap up in your face.
And no one knows just why it chose
to make its way straight to the nose.
I s’ppose the nose one must conclude
was predisposed to just protrude.
We sniff the odour from below
so up the nose the whiff will flow.
So this much I can guarantee
there’s no such smell to this degree.
It’s reputation as a stench
is said to make whole nations wrench.
I think those with an ostomy
will know this stink because to me
they may have started out this way
and lived to fart another day.
B. Withers 2013