Seeking Advice on Revisiting the Swinging Lifestyle with an Ostomy

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janee
Oct 20, 2009 6:29 am
Hi again folks
Well, I seem to be having some real relationship majors. Firstly I thank you all for your feedback on my last question. Life has been looking a lot better with an investment in some sexy underwear which hides the dreaded ostomy pouch. Now, I face another problem. Some 20-25 years ago as a couple we dabbled in the swinging lifestyle. This weekend one of those couples is coming to stay with us. My partner has suggested that I pick up some adult movies and we see what eventuates!! My ostomy has happened since those old days and the thought to me now is no way. Am I seeing this the correct way?? I look forward to your responses.
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Past Member
Oct 20, 2009 10:13 am
Hi janee, sit down with them and explain about your ostomy and see what they think. You might be suprised.
ostomom
Oct 21, 2009 1:43 am
I agree.  I wouldn't say "no" to something that you used to enjoy just because you have an ostomy now.  If you are comfortable with your body, your partner most likely will be too.  Good Luck!
Posted by: Audrey Warren

This site is a godsend. As a newbie (colostomy on Nov 8, '21), I look at it every day for a number of reasons. Reading what people are going through makes me grateful that my elective surgery because of a severe case of IBS-C is nothing compared to what they have been through and are still living with.

I don't have to go to the hospital for anything related to my ostomy. I feel sorry for those who do and am in awe of those who can use humor to describe their ordeal. I identify with those who express their fears. I especially identify with those who are depressed because I am clinically depressed and have general anxiety disorder. How ironic that having a colostomy eliminated some of the depression and anxiety that the IBS created. I've been widowed twice and I'm on match.com.
I immediately included my operation in my profile and am pleased to say it doesn't seem to make a difference.

And there is much humor on this site and it's one of the reasons I enjoy it so much.

I could name numerous things I've learned from reading people's comments/questions/answers.

After months following on a daily basis, my only negative comment is I don't like listing the most popular members.
It's not that I don't like these people; I do. It's that I think it elicits some "Facebook"-like banter or comments that are gratuitous.

I don't do any social media and think that its merits are overshadowed by too much negativity.

Meetanostomate is in no way negative. I just think the gallery of "popularity" detracts from what is an excellent website that deals with a serious issue that causes a myriad of emotions.

tarababy
Oct 21, 2009 11:50 am
Hi Janee, I think you should let them come over and after a few drinks and a chat..Maybe the conversation will come up about whats been going on in your life since you all last seen each other???   That leaves it open for you to be open and honest with them..All you can do is be honest,let them know your nervous and you need their understanding not their sympathy...and well, everything else is working...so I'd be sorting a cute out-fit out for the evening.....
   Also, dont take it hard if they shy away at first...remember that ignorance breeds detachment.(or something like that...lmao).The more they know it wont interfere with whats in store-the more you have a chance of it going extremely well...I think you will be fine...and I say go for it...Whats life for ?  if not for living and doing what you enjoy...Good luck...and enjoy!!!!.Tara
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