Ostomy And Dating

Having an ostomy can be a challenging experience, and it may require some adjustment when it comes to dating. An ostomy is a surgical procedure that involves creating an opening in the abdomen to allow waste to exit the body. This opening is called a stoma, and a pouch is attached to it to collect the waste.

Here are some things to keep in mind when it comes to dating with an ostomy:

1. It's up to you when to disclose your ostomy: There is no right or wrong time to disclose your ostomy to a potential partner. You may want to wait until you feel comfortable with the person or until the relationship has progressed to a certain point. However, it's important to be honest and open about your ostomy so that your partner can understand your needs and support you.

2. Educate your partner about your ostomy: Many people may not know what an ostomy is or what it entails. It can be helpful to educate your partner about your ostomy, how it affects your daily life, and how they can support you.

3. Be confident: Having an ostomy can be a source of insecurity for some people. However, your ostomy does not define you, and it is just one aspect of your life. Be confident in yourself and your abilities, and know that there are people who will accept and support you.

4. Consider your clothing choices: Some people may choose to wear looser or more comfortable clothing to accommodate their ostomy pouch. However, this is a personal choice, and you should wear whatever makes you feel comfortable and confident.

5. Be open to intimacy: It's natural to feel anxious about intimacy with an ostomy. However, many people with ostomies are able to have fulfilling sexual relationships. You may need to experiment with different positions or techniques to find what works best for you.

Here are some strategies and perspectives shared on the MeetAnOstoMate Discussion Forum:

1. Disclosure and Timing:
- Some suggest waiting until the relationship becomes more intimate and physical before disclosing the ostomy.
- Others advise being upfront about the ostomy when getting to know someone, as it can help filter out unsupportive individuals early on.

2. Confidence and Self-Acceptance:
- Emphasize the importance of self-acceptance, confidence, and being comfortable in one's own skin when dating with an ostomy.
- It's crucial to focus on personal qualities and not let the ostomy define one's self-worth.

3. Practical Tips:
- Consider using products like underwear and lingerie for ostomates, cap systems, or pouches that can be attached higher to make the ostomy seem smaller to feel more comfortable during intimacy.
- Some individuals have found success in using clothing or accessories to conceal the ostomy during intimate moments.

4. Navigating Rejection:
- Rejection is a part of dating, and it's important to accept it and understand that each rejection brings you closer to finding the right person.
- It's essential to find someone who accepts and appreciates all aspects of oneself, including the ostomy.

5. Online Dating and Support:
- Joining dating apps and sites can help in finding understanding partners.
- Seeking support from like-minded individuals in ostomy support groups can provide a safe space for expressing feelings and experiences.

6. Maintaining a Positive Outlook:
- It's important to maintain a positive outlook and not let the ostomy hinder one's ability to enjoy life and seek companionship.
- Some individuals have found love and acceptance despite having an ostomy, emphasizing the importance of remaining hopeful and patient in the search for a partner.

Check out these links for more information:

• Dating with an ostomy: Seeking advice and experiences (May 01, 2021)
• Dating with an Ostomy: Share Your Stories (November 15, 2021)
• Dating with an Ostomy: The Struggles and Frustrations (March 28, 2021)
• Approaching dating with an ileostomy bag - advice needed! (February 27, 2014)
• Experiences with Osto-Date? (October 09, 2019)
• Romance after Ostomy: How to Share My Story? (August 15, 2009)
• How to navigate dating red tape and avoid negative patterns? (March 08, 2015)
• Seeking advice on dating with an ileostomy (April 06, 2016)
• How to discuss ostomy with a date? (May 19, 2013)
• Dating with a bag: possible or not? (March 09, 2014)