This topic is about navigating the world of dating and intimacy when you have an ileostomy. It can be challenging to figure out how and when to share this part of your life with someone new, and how it might affect your relationships. Here are some pieces of advice and insights from others who have been in similar situations:

1. Be open early: It's often helpful to tell a potential partner about your ostomy before things get too serious. This can build trust, reduce anxiety, and help you find someone who is truly supportive.

2. Rejection is a filter, not a verdict: Remember, your ostomy won't stop you from finding the right person; it will just help you avoid the wrong ones. If someone leaves because of it, they weren't the right match for you.

3. Honesty equals trust: Keeping your ostomy a secret can create a dishonest foundation. Being open and honest fosters genuine intimacy.

4. Engage, don’t lurk: Whether online or in real life, participating in conversations helps people get to know you. Staying silent can make it harder to connect with others.

5. Use mainstream dating sites and state it up-front: Some people find it helpful to mention their ostomy in their dating profiles. This can remove the stress of disclosure and still attract interest.

6. Expand your social life: Spend time with friends and family, pursue hobbies, join groups, and go out. Often, chance meetings can lead to meaningful relationships.

7. Light-hearted approach: Using humor can help relax someone who is unfamiliar with ostomies. Keep explanations simple and answer questions as they come up.

8. Personal success stories: There are many success stories out there. For example, one person with a 30-year ileostomy has had both one-night stands and long-term relationships without any issues. Another with a 23-year ileostomy has been married twice and had another long-term relationship.

9. Distance can be an issue: On niche sites, distance can be a challenge since most people can't easily relocate. Keep this in mind when looking for connections online.

10. Gender perspectives: Some feel that women might be more accepting than men, but empathy can be found on both sides.

11. Resource reminder: The forum's "Lifestyle & Intimacy – Relationships & ostomy" section has many past discussions that might be helpful.