This topic is about the journey of living with the after-effects of colitis surgery, particularly dealing with pelvic pain, challenges in intimacy, and fears of being single forever. The person sharing their story has experienced a lot over the years, including surgeries that have improved their health but left them with some difficult side effects. Here are some insights and advice that might be helpful:

1. Don't lose hope in finding a relationship. There are many caring and empathetic people out there who are willing to understand and accommodate your needs. The key is to find them and not assume they don't exist.

2. Consider that partners who are selfish or impatient can actually help you by filtering themselves out. This leaves room for those who are genuinely kind and understanding.

3. Try building connections through shared interests or hobbies, such as joining writing groups, yoga classes, language courses, art workshops, or meditation sessions. Friendships formed through mutual interests can often grow into deeper, more understanding relationships.

4. It's important to maintain healthy boundaries and prioritize kindness when choosing partners. Look for those whose everyday actions already show consideration and empathy.

5. There are professional options available for managing pelvic-floor pain:
- Consult a gynecologist to assess any issues with pelvic-muscle tension.
- Pelvic-floor physiotherapy can help train your muscles to relax.
- Botox injections into the pelvic muscles are another option some doctors recommend, though they can be costly.

6. Being single is perfectly okay if that's what you prefer. However, if you desire a partnership, keep searching—many people find fulfilling love later in life.

7. Focus on your inner well-being through activities like meditation, laughter, and creative pursuits. Personal peace and happiness can attract like-minded, compassionate people into your life.