I was at the eye doctor getting my eyes examined when my stoma decided to pass gass or as we call farting. It was embarrassing as hell and I Did not know what to say to my eye doctor. Needless to say I was mortified. Do i tell him i have an ostomy or pretend that nothing just happened? I said nothing as though nothing happened but I only imagine what he was thinking.Now i have anxiety at the thought of going back there again and I have a dental appointment comming up soon.Maybe i should just avoid eating that day and take an anti gas pill before I go.What would u do?
I would tell him I have an ostomy and can't help it. He's a doctor. And be thankful if it didn't smell too.
Hello Dee H.
It's a good post and I'm pretty sure many of us have been in similar situations. It is not easy to decide on a 'best' course of action under such circumstances as the event can lead to a paralysis of thought and overwhelming embarrassment. However, this does not happen to me nowadays because I irrigate and I wear a stoma plug. These plugs are made of a sort of spongey material that absorbes the fart in such a way that it gets throught he sponge and stops it making a noise. It also has a charcole filter that stops the smell.
I notice from your past posts that you have considered trying irrigation. Perhaps this incident will encourage you to give it a go and reap the benefits of a wholly different approach to managing the vagaries of the stoma.
Usually when I'm at the doctor or dentist, I have a habit of holding my hand over my stoma. It's not obvious - just crossing my arms over my belly with my hand resting over it. As a medical professional they should be able to be adult about it and just ignore it.
I do the same as LoMac66. But any paperwork you fill out for a doctor's appointment doesn't specify an ostomy, just "Do you have any other conditions not listed here."
I miss farting once in a while. But if you do as LoMac and I do, it sounds more like a muffled stomach growl. Unless you drink a lot of beer like I've been known to do and it was one of those loud explosive stoma farts. Don't fret and don't be embarrassed. Own it. Good replies are:
- Whoa!.....Did someone step on a duck? - Rodney Dangerfield
- Wow man....did you hear that barking spider?
- Look at the doc and say "Bless you".
- There must be a wild frog in here....
- Nod sagely and say, "The toothless one has spoken".
- Or you could say excuse me. But what's the fun in that? Just my 2 cents.
Interesting conversation. I believe though that we are the only ones who know exactly 'where' the sound is coming from, so it could 'just be a fart'- does it really matter if it came out of our tummy instead of our butt? I'm a firm believer that unless somebody is sitting on your lap or practically right next to you, they can't tell which hole the air is coming out of. It's just that WE know, so we think everybody else can. I am going to test it out sometime - LOL. And coughing is always good IF you know it's coming. Coughing covers up a plethora of noises:)
Personally, I like to put my hand over my stoma to silence further outbursts, put in a comment like, "sorry my stoma is asking for clarification." Or, "Sorry, my stoma says she agrees."
Eye doctor has no choice but to figure it out real quick. They should have learned this in school. Your stoma is like a pop quiz. . . if they're not sure about it, they know that it's THEIR deficiency, not yours. And when making your appointment, you can always mention the stoma to give them a heads' up. Like, you're a doctor, get THIS, get ready!
Love me, love my stoma.
Much easier when they want your credit card, yeah?
eat less carbs
I usually say "George (my stoma) says "hello".
My first embassassing moment was while in the hospital when I first got him. I was introducing myself to my new nurse when he spouted off. It has been downhill since then.
When my husband would fart we would lauge and say "Barking Tree Spiders". Now I say George is practicing his ventriloquist act.