Have you ever stuck your finger in your mouth?

Well.........that WOULD be an interesting place to keep them.......if they weren't so sharp and pointy.  

;0)

Did you buy any candy with your two dimes and a nickel?

It's not safe to insert anything into your stoma.

Hello Heidi92.

Thank you so much for this concept: I need a regular supply of these to keep my rhymes coming. 

Best wishes

Bill

IT'S NOT SAFE!

It's not safe to stick your finger,
into your stoma or to linger
on that thought for very long,
because for some this may seem wrong.

But it's not safe to breathe the air,
because some people do not care
and have polluted it so much
it's something lungs should never touch.

It is not safe to walk the street
because some people you might meet
could be there, so it's been said
to do you harm or make you dead.

It is not safe to fly a plane,
to ride a bike or catch a train,
for all these means of transport will
sometimes end up with a kill.

It is not safe to drink water
or, at least I think you ought'er
consider just how clean it is
before you drink and come amiss.

It is not safe to lay your head
Down upon your comfy bed,
and if you need a reason why
this is where most people will die.

It is not safe to vaccinate,
or this is what some people state,
but I would feel I was a ‘dick'
if I refused to have the prick.

It is not safe to be alive,
for in that state it seems we strive
to do all sorts of stupid stuff
until we're dead or had enough.

                                    B. Withers 2021

Heidi,

 I can only offer up this gem as a rebuttal;

"“The death rate for people who play it safe and for those who live boldly is the same.”
― Patti Digh

;0)

bob

Well, have fun and be sure to wash your hands! 

There you go again, playing it safe..........

;0)

You came up with an entire poem from my random comment?? You are amazing! Thanks for sharing your poetry with us.

My pleasure entirely!

I do it weekly when I irrigate, as it seems to dialate the opening of the stoma and makes it easier to insert the irrigation cone and get the flow of water moving through the stoma. I insert my index finger at least past the point of the second nuckle and hold it there for a minute or two and then remove it and then imediately insert the irrigation cone. Of course, I always make sure to wear gloves during this process.  

I am shocked you all haven't stuck your finger in there. It was one of the first things I did! When I had my first temporary loop ostomy I had a lot of problems and blockages happened a lot so I did what I could to dig them out. I would rather DIY then go to an ER and have them do it. Now I have a permanent ostomy so it doesn't seem like I have quite the same problems and I rarely need to stick my finger in there anymore. It is a really strange feeling. 

Atta girl Dagger!  Now there's at least 4 daredevils amongst us!!  Hmmmmm.......I wonder if this could go viral?

;0)

bob  

What a buch of Weirdos...LOL...  I guess it 's  one way to give your Ostomy the Finger   !!  

I bought a candy bar after I cleaned the change really well. That was many years ago, so today I'd have to probably swallow a dollar in order to get enough change for a candy bar.

I think everyone should try it at least once. After all, how many people get a chance to know what their guts feel like? ;D

Eventually  Bob  😈....the Grim Reaper gets us all .  People in Ireland would say  .

"  Ara Sure we all have to die from something !! "     ( Ara Sure is like ...whaddyagointodo , shit happens ! ) 

You are so lucky in the US that being knocked out is even a thing! No such luck here in the UK it's standard to get the full screen view while wide awake, with the odd "are you ok?" Comments. 
Being a polite Brit we never flipping complain lol 

I saw this post and thought "this has to be Bob"...... yep 😊