Relationships and Intimacy discussions

Hi. I have a question for you single ostomates out there who have tried the dating thing. I haven't gotten up the courage to do that since my colostomy and I'm not sure I ever will. Could sure use some input on the subject. When do you tell a prospective date about it? My gut tells me to put my cards on the table and tell them immediately, thus giving them plenty of time to head for the hills. ...

I have commented to others here how being impotent has only changed how things are done and other than that it is not all that important. I also stated that my bag had not affected our relationship, that my wife was fine with it all.
Without going into details, my [not our] last night bedroom activities were about as satisfying as if she was not there with me. Nothing I tried was what she want ...

So, now we've reached one of those topics I might not have the easiest time discussing, but I'm going to try, because, after all, this is still a huge thing when you have an ostomy.
As I've written before, having an ostomy causes no limitations per se, and that is true with sex as well. Any possible limitation probably exists only in your own mind. At least that's the way it is for me. Obvious ...

How is this possible? Unless the other is just like you or similar, how do you go through all the red tape of dating or a date, then explain your situation? How can you charm that girl only to reveal a gross characteristic? I've tried. I was shunned every time in my 12 attempts with the same reactions, which is a disturbed mood-changing stiff-faced expression, then an abrupt ending or they're ...

Is it just me or is it hard to convince ourselves that the surgery has not played a part in the choice of someone to go with someone else rather than you, eh...?

Lol. Really... 24 years old, trying to live my life fully... as I wish I could, lol. Well, I think I do pretty well... but is it just me that feels like I can't be a beast with someone who is just not aware of my situation, eh? I me ...

Ok... I just remembered what someone told me two days ago and I just had to ask. Someone told me that there is a fetish for people with stomas. Like a pornographic subgenre out there. I told them that while I know that there is some crazy out there... that couldn't possibly be true. There is no way in God's green earth that I am even going to think of looking that up. But has anyone ever heard ...

Sometimes, I think it would be easier to wear a sign that says:
I have a colostomy, if still interested call.....
Dating is hard enough!! LOL

I have read a lot about other people's views on dating with an ostomy, and I feel like my view differs a bit. I feel like I would want to be upfront about having an ostomy. I don't want to start liking someone only to find out they are going to be a runner. So this is for those who feel similar to me. How did you bring it up? Also, has anyone on here successfully met someone and has a long-ter ...

I just do not think I can bring myself to tell a potential lover that I am preparing to get an ileostomy. I know it is my own insecurities, and no matter how I try to think of it in a positive way, I end up with tears in my eyes, embarrassed and don't know what to say. I think if I was rejected, it would be devastating to me. Yes, I know it means I dodged a bullet, but I do not know how to tel ...

I have a date this weekend and am not sure how to bring up the subject of my ostomy. I don't think anything is going to happen, but it was a fairly important event in my life....and something that I should probably tell her about.
I'm not secretive about it and not ashamed of it by any means...but I also tend to be a little flippant..."Oh yeah, four years ago I almost died. Spent a month in th ...

I just have to say this out loud....I miss sex and I want it! *Whew* I feel better now, thanks.

I had my ileostomy nearly two years ago now. I am thinking of starting to see someone again, as my marriage did not last through the lovely bag hanging off me. When is the best time to tell a woman about the bag? Should it be from the offset or hide the fact till you get to know her, or is that deceitful? Ladies, what do you think, and what experiences have you all had in this area, good or bad?

I am a widow - I have been talking to a fantastic guy online. He is perfect. He wants to meet me - do I tell him I have an ileostomy before or after we meet face to face? I do not want to lose him at this point. Could some men tell me how they would like to learn this before or after face to face? Thanks.

To all women,
A sincere happy International Women's Day... Thought this might be the appropriate day to voice the disturbing, yet not surprising, frequency of women's experiences with dating (with an ostomy) compared to that of men's. It's more than unfortunate that almost exclusively women have faced the "Oh, you have an ostomy?.... Is that what I think it.... Umm... Ok, I'll call you... Mayb ...

What do men think of women who tell them they are hooked up to a colostomy? I'm speaking mainly of those men who are potential dating partners. How do I get up confidence to start dating again? It's been over 2 years.