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Dumped because of ostomy

Posted by sunasea, on Sun Jul 26, 2015 11:59 pm

Hi again, perhaps we may meet up online; maybe we can pick a time - say tomorrow at 5 PM Central Standard Time?????

Reply by luv2day, on Mon Jul 27, 2015 1:07 am
sunasea wrote:

Hi again, perhaps we may meet up online; maybe we can pick a time - say tomorrow at 5 PM Central Standard Time?????


Ok I'll be here! Talk to you then.

luv2day, Rene

Reply by sunasea, on Tue Jul 28, 2015 6:38 pm

Sorry I missed you!

 

Sincerly,

 

Tom

Reply by peterepete, on Wed Aug 26, 2015 4:55 am

Hi Nini79,

I'm just 7 weeks post-op and have been thinking about dating again. and yeah when is the right time to tell your date ? I can see both sides of the fence on this one. I'm 55 and have had a quad heart by-pass before my APR. I would like to think the mature\older the person the easier the choice of disclosure would be. I also think acceptance would be more difficult for Males than Females. Any way if you figure it out let me know!

 

Reply by luv2day, on Wed Aug 26, 2015 10:03 am
peterepete wrote:

Hi Nini79,

I'm just 7 weeks post-op and have been thinking about dating again. and yeah when is the right time to tell your date ? I can see both sides of the fence on this one. I'm 55 and have had a quad heart by-pass before my APR. I would like to think the mature\older the person the easier the choice of disclosure would be. I also think acceptance would be more difficult for Males than Females. Any way if you figure it out let me know!

 Hi Pete, not sure why I'm getting your post to Nini79 so you might want to try again. Hope you're having a blessed day. luv2day aka Rene

 



Reply by sunasea, on Thu Aug 27, 2015 11:32 pm

Sorry i missed you; been hiknig, mountain cllimbing, and running in Coeur D'Alane ID without inernet for the past three weeks.  Hope all is well.  Self confidence is the key and more so, I believe you create your own reality, ok?

 

Sincerely,

 

Tom

Reply by luv2day, on Fri Aug 28, 2015 1:00 pm

Hi Tom,

who exactly are you trying to contact? I'm not Nini79, I'm luv2day!

Hope you're having a great day!

luv2day

Reply by sunasea, on Fri Aug 28, 2015 8:08 pm

I'm  not sure sure lol

Reply by PonyBoy, on Thu Sep 24, 2015 2:21 pm

Hey Wendy,

 

Sorry so late posting here, this is first I've seen it. I'm sorry for what you went through. I kinda went through similar. After my initial surgery and extended hospital stay my ex had previously left sent me divorce papers. I, being upset with what all went down, held out to make her mad. Anyway, I came to my senses and went ahead and granted her the divorce.

 

But on dating, it's been since 2008, and I'm still not dating. Guess I can't get around the fact of crapping in my lap, and asking a woman to go out....lol. I get lonely at times wishing I had someone to carry on with and have fun with, but I'm just too used to doing it this way I suppose. Maybe a little fear of rejection because of the bag...

 

I don't know, maybe one day I'll figure it out. How are you doing nowadays with dating? Gotten any better? I need some hope...lol!

 

Hope all here is well! Have a good day folks!

 

Lewis

Reply by magoo, on Fri Oct 02, 2015 12:40 am

Hi there....my name is Eamon.

I can not bring myself to get into the non-osto dating game. I would love to write and chat..

get in touch , we can chat..??

Eamon

Reply by Itallnewtome, on Sat Oct 24, 2015 8:42 pm

Hi am milton and am a bag man myself. I have not looked for date from time I got my bag I just wanted to say he sounded like a jerk in the first place. Please keep looking you give up and you lose. A real man will come around that understands and is not just looking for one thing. Don't let it get to you. Hahah wow did that sound dumb lol. How many times has someone told me that. Oh well the main thing is keep looking he is out there

Reply by luv2day, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 4:42 pm

Hi Milton, this is not my post, I was just replying to it. Hope you're having a great Sunday!

Take care, 

luv2day

Reply by Itallnewtome, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 5:19 pm

Well hello there your my first person to ever talk to on here. I have been with a bag for a year now and not one person to talk to.   It's hard to talk to anyone about it because they don't understand    And thanks for replying back to me am glad you did. I hope soon to talk to someone that is the same as I am. That would be awesome knowing that understand what am saying. Anyway hope your having a great day yourself   

Reply by luv2day, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 5:31 pm

Hi Milton, to me this is the hardest website to navigate around and I'm a techy. I understand what you're saying about now having anyone to talk to. I befriended this guy and he ended up stalking me. I got very discouraged after that. I find what's best is to set up a date and time to meet on here, instead of always checking for msgs. I'd love to make friends with ostomates (no stalkers). It's hard out there in the world of non ostomates. How's your Sunday going?

Reply by luv2day, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 5:35 pm

Hi Eamon, I just checked in. Sorry for the delay. How's your Sunday going? Let me guess! Football, I thought so. Me too. Pick a time so we can chat on here. Have a great day. No popcorn 😢

Reply by luv2day, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 5:39 pm

I'm not Wendy, I'm Rene!

Reply by luv2day, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 5:43 pm

What

Reply by Itallnewtome, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 5:47 pm

Heyyyy  glad you got back to me. Like I said your the first person I have talked to on here. My day is going ok. It's raining here today something we needed so bad. Hope your having a great day. That is if we can have a great day. Have not had one of them in a long long time.   No am not a stalker. Don't know what I'd do with you if I had you lol. Am just a man who has worked hard all of his life to face this stuff all by myself at my age. Never saw it cooking. I guess am talking my head off. Just so happy to talk to someone that can relate 

Reply by luv2day, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 5:59 pm

I've had my ileostomy since 1981, and I've done this all by myself. I get it, I really do. I made a plan for my life, that regardless of my situation, I'd be happy. I make sure to remind myself that it could be so much worse. I've had health issues all my life, and I want to live. I want to be happy just like everyone else. Having an ileostomy does not rule my heart. It's windy and cold here in Nevada. Where do you live? Let's meet again cuz I want to watch football. Tell me when...

Reply by luv2day, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 6:00 pm

Oh yea, where's your photo?

Reply by Itallnewtome, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 6:10 pm

Well if you talking to me lol. We could come on at Anytime you want as long as it's b4 10 pm. Just let me know. I'd love to talk. Ty's 

Reply by luv2day, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 7:10 pm

What time zone are you? I'm PST. 

Reply by Itallnewtome, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 7:16 pm

Ok think am getting this now lol. It's 6 :15 pm here. Just give me a time   Anytime you want 

Reply by luv2day, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 7:22 pm

How about 5:00 pm tomorrow night. My time!!! I'll set my alarm!!! See you then and have a great evening.

Reply by Itallnewtome, on Sun Oct 25, 2015 8:10 pm

Sounds good. Have a good night 

Reply by magoo, on Tue Oct 27, 2015 9:03 am

Hi there Rene. I'm back in wet and windy Ireland again !!

My brain is still in San Francisco...and my heart. i was in Reno & Tahoe 2 weeks ago.

Eamon.

Reply by danieldore, on Fri Dec 11, 2015 5:54 pm

Hey joe sorry i cant reply your message i am not a full member yet ya see wanna see what the site.is all about haha

Reply by FreddyBoy, on Sun Jan 10, 2016 12:05 pm

Dear Brown Eye Lady

Im learning that the problem isn't the Ileostomy as much as it not easy to meet people unless you try online dating. It's awkward enough to meet people online. For whatever reason I feel that it would be wrong for me to start dating someone without them knowing I have an Ostomy. Which is a hard thing to mention before you even get to know someone. I been strugging with getting back the dating scene so I can meet someone to spend the rest of my life with. But I'm putting to much stress on myself before I even try. I'm still the same guy who had my uup's and down after my Crohn's Disesse was diagnose at 19 years old. My passion for being in a loving relationship and not letting the Ilestomy,Crohn's or any other complications identify who I'am as a person. Yes it's a big part of my life and it's definity harder to meet people to date at 58 years young.

Unfortuately there are people out there that think having the High school Quarterback or Prom queen is what a loving relationship is all about. Most likely I'm going to run into people that won't want to date me after I let them know about my Crohn's disease and Permant Ileostomy. And I'm sure it will disappoint and upset me. 

But afterreading your message I feel if someone going to me so shallow before they even got to know you. Then you the one to luck out. It's been just over two years since I ended a relationship after 14 years.  I join this site to see if I could meet people that had an Ostomy in the Chicago,Il area.  But there not that many people in my area close to my age. I'm like you a Brown eye guy looking for my brown eye girl.

I move out of my house when I was 18 year young. Up until two years ago I was always in a relationship. My Crohn's disease was an obsticle for me regarding getting married. It's was important to me not to get married until my Crohn's was under control. The next 15 years I spent two month each year either in the hospital or recovering from Surgery. Three of my operations I didn't having insurance coverage for per existing condition.

I didn't think it would be responsible to get married and have kids without being able to provide for my family. As of six months ago my Crohn's is under control. People that know me I'm either Swimming, Snorking or golfing Golf. 

Please know that you have giving me that additional courage to go out and try online dating sites other then this Ostomy General information dating site. My first choice would be to meet someone from this site where we can support each other. But I know there people out there that want to connect souls and share a chemistry. 

The only concerns is where to start?

 

Thank you and the people on this general Chat site. If anyone has any additional tips other then internet dating sites.I did join this site to learn and hopefully meet some new friends and maybe a potential partner for life.

 

I would greatly welcome the advice.

 

FreddyBoy

 

 

Reply by FreddyBoy, on Sun Feb 07, 2016 2:57 pm

Hello and I appreciate the effort to pair people together.  But I want to clear up any confusion.  I wasn't drop by a guy or a womem. I. Left my girlfriend of 14 years because she started to tell me that I can't be friends with people that she didn't like. And was going through my cell phone to see who I was friend with. She wanted me to stop being friends with my grade school buddies. She cxld any plans and push everyone away.

She couldn't handle my health issues and the relationship was that I needed to give up on trying to find work. I left her when my friends offer to help me move versus not having a life stuck at home. I still love her back needed to have a social life.

 

I would love your help to meethe someone to share a life with base on supporting each other and making the life together while we try to lead a normal life.  I miss having a loving partner. Any help in meeting someone would be an amazing gift. I believe living is giving. 

 

All the best and I hope to hear back from you. I'm a fun loving guy with a great sense of humor. And I really miss having partner who like and share and support living together with the life based on happiness and the support of growing nature. Thank you again for what you do I think it's fabulous that you're helping other people who have head a difficult life with health issues that made it difficult to feel confident in dating. Hopefully I can overcome my own self imposed issues related tapping lost so my confidence due to a physical change 

Reply by danieldore, on Mon Feb 08, 2016 5:29 am

Omg she seems insane!!!!! She was probs making a hitlist of your mates so only she could have you muhahahahaha!!!

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